Microblog Monday: Mama PhD [Candidate] Edition

She finished her PhD when her children were very small; I don’t remember exactly how young, but when I was expecting Oz I e-mailed her to ask her how she did it. One thing she said was (and I paraphrase): “I decided to do it while they were young, because they wouldn’t remember not having me around.” And I just couldn’t get on board with that. I don’t believe that what you don’t remember doesn’t affect you.

I applied to grad schools while we were TTC, and decided to postpone neither. It has been way, way harder than I ever imagined it would be. Whenever I see a mother announcing on FB that she’s going back to grad school, I cringe, I want to say “don’t do it!” And then when I see a mother of two getting her doctorate in three years I want to disappear.

I have to stay on track. I am on track, right now. It’s do or die time.

I never want to have to explain to my daughter why I never finished my doctorate. Not when I’m this close.

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is?Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.


9 Responses to “Microblog Monday: Mama PhD [Candidate] Edition”

  1. Mel Says:

    Cheering you on from the sidelines.

    I was always in awe of the woman in my program who had a daughter. Sometimes she would bring the 5-year-old to class with her. The little girl would sit in the room, drawing, while the rest of us took notes.

  2. nabanita21 Says:

    It’s hard the choices we women have to make..But don’t worry it will all work out and pls don’t give up on anything you want!

    Random Thoughts Naba…#MicroblogMondays: I Wish To Read It Again……

  3. CJ Says:

    I completely agree with you. I applaud you in your pursuits now. I don’t know how you have the energy!

  4. Tara Says:

    You can totally do it. It doesn’t matter what it looks like to anyone else- just to you. You made the best decisions you could have. The ones that match you. Hugs sweetie

  5. noemi Says:

    I don’t know how you are doing it. Seriously. I finished the last six months of my grad program after my daughter was born and it was brutal. Truly. The whole program was brutal and I question whether it was one of the biggest, most expensive, mistakes of my life. Only time will tell.

    You will finish this. I know you will. You can do it.

  6. Mali Says:

    I agree with Nabanita. It seems unfair that women have to grapple with these decisions. But good for you! Congrats for being on track. That’s never easy, whatever we’re dealing with.

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