I just called my therapist’s office to cancel my appointment for Monday, and got the news that SHE PASSED AWAY. The last time I saw her, three weeks ago, we actually had to cut our session short because she had a terrible migraine. Apparently it was symptomatic of a cerebral hemorrhage, which caused her death then three days later. I’m in shock, it doesn’t seem real. She has a 7 year old daughter. I can’t believe she’s gone, that I’ll never have a chance to talk to her again and tell her how much she has helped me.
And then there’s the little intermittent achy discomfort I’m getting just under my right-side ribs. They said that if I should feel pain there, in the “upper right quadrant,” to call them right away. (*Pain in this area is a classic symptom of HELLP syndrome) I wanted to wait and see how it might evolve… because it doesn’t really feel like *pain* per se, but T. wants me to call them now. So I guess I will. I don’t want to, because I think they’ll send me to the hospital right away and I won’t come out again until the baby is born… and what about V.? My little one, how will she be ok? I can’t even begin to describe in words how desperately I don’t want to leave her.
Update: I just called, and the nurse said that since it’s not a sharp pain, and it’s intermittent, to just rest and wait. She will let the doctor know that I called, however. In any case, I’m going to go ahead and pack my bag for the hospital. Because, really and truly, I don’t want to, you know, die.