This post is all about the Critter and me.
So tonight while putting V. to bed it felt like I had no milk. At all. She’d suck, get frustrated, roll off my lap, crawl back on, try to suck again… I don’t know how long we kept it up. I wanted her to keep sucking to stimulate production but she was getting tired of not getting any reward. Finally I put her into her crib and walked out for 3 minutes, drank a bunch of water, came back in (she was screaming the whole time, and saying “droosh! droosh!” (her new word for “nurse”). When I came back, I think she got a little bit of milk… but I really only saw her actually swallow 2-3 times. She pretty much fell asleep on the breast. I was crying.
I planned all along to wean at 1 year, and have thought a lot about my sister’s comment that “as soon as you introduce solids, you’ve started weaning.” But I hadn’t taken any steps towards it. Nursing has decreased to 3-4 times a day, although last night she woke and nursed 3x (at 11:30, 2:30, and 4:30) and there didn’t seem to be any problem with supply then. I actually thought all that nursing would increase my supply today.
So I’m feeling bewildered and sad, and unsure how to proceed. Should I introduce milk now? What kind? Formula? Her 1-year checkup is a week from Monday, I guess I’ll wait to make any big changes until then, although I will go ahead and try introducing cottage cheese this week.
I have loved nursing my baby and it makes me so sad to think about stopping. I know not everybody has had good experiencing with breast feeding, this is just me and what it meant to me. So I’m sad right now. But also thankful that we have been able to do it this long.