I was looking through my archives today, for no real reason and with a pile of other things I need to do more urgently – but realized the obvious: I used to write a lot more than I do now. It was kind of cool to see all those words that I put out there, catch an old narrative thread, glimpse the algorhythms of hope and sadness.
Right now, I can’t think of anything to write about that isn’t a) trite and commonplace, b) totally Critter-centric, or c) complaining. Although I complained a whole bunch today on my other blog.
Well, here: a couple thoughts wrested from comments I made this week on other people’s blog posts.
1) Mel wrote about how badly the press handles celebribump news , and I wrote a comment in response that was eaten by the WWW and is now forever lost. Anyway, it was just a rant about the cover story on US weekly a month or two back, on Brangelina – “IT WAS IVF!” What bothered me most in the reporting was the quotes from an unnamed source “close to the couple,” saying that they had done IVF because it was “easier” than TTC naturally. They were impatient and wanted to “knock it out.” First of all, how in the world is IVF either easy or convenient? I didn’t check out the success rates they cited, but really. I was more or less incensed. It made it seem like people who do IVF are selfish and impatient.
2) I applauded Dr. Grumbles on speaking out about IF etc. to her students. It’s still really hard for me to cop to our struggles to conceive. Even when someone else opens the door to a confessional by talking about their own struggles. The other day I had little V. with me at a meeting, and while we were hanging out waiting for the formal part to begin another woman started talking about conceiving her first. She reminisced that she’d had a couple drinks with a friend for the first time in two years, and found out later she was pg at the time. The second was conceived easily. I forced myself to mention that it had taken us a while to conceive as well. We exchanged one glance of mutual understanding before our professor/mentor chimed in that isn’t that just how it goes, when you least expect it/stop trying/relax is when you conceive.
I didn’t correct her.
We conceived on the cycle that we tried the hardest.
So, I wasn’t going to complain, but there you have it. On a happier note, I recently survived another weekend with my in-laws, and this time I didn’t once experience the acute desire to jump out of the moving car or drive a knitting needle through my eye. Progress! 🙂