Closets

I realized today that I’m so in the IF closet that I couldn’t even bring myself to write “infertility” under the blog title. I changed it today. I also realized that the MAIN REASON I’m in the closet about IF is that I’m in the closet about TTC. This sounds stupid, but it’s like I don’t want people (meaning, specifically, church people of my parents’ generation, including primarily and most of all my in-laws) to know/think/suspect I’m “doing it” with my husband.

HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT?

Thank all the little puppies for this blog where I can actually say “fuck” and not feel like I’m going straight to hell.

I had a dream 2 nights ago (yay, here we go with more amateur dream analysis!)* about washing a kitchen towel in clear, clean flowing water that was coming out of a rocky spring in someone’s kitchen. Here’s what the dream dictionary had to say:

“Clearing negative feelings such as despair or self doubt; fears about health – neurotic phobias about ones own wholeness. Sometimes this is shown as a healing of past hurts or tensions, even a warming of cold emotions. If clear and sparkling it symbolises faith, fearlessness, purity of feeling, hope and joy. It is also symbolic of spirituality, knowledge, healing and refreshment. If the water is calm, clear, then it signifies that you are in tune with your spirituality. It denotes serenity, peace of mind, and rejuvenation.”

Pretty cool.

*sarcasm intended

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2 Responses to “Closets”

  1. Samantha Says:

    I never remember my dreams that well.

    I’m glad you’ve come out of the closet here!

  2. SaraS-P Says:

    I love the virtual pet turtle! What a perfect name!

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